Having 2 kids in 2 years, and working 2 teaching jobs and working as a duty manager in a health club (of all places) hasn't left me much time to dedicate the hours it takes for me to achieve a dancers physic. I couldn't confidently talk on camera about being a professional dancer and teacher, if I felt that I didn't look like one.This lead me to think more about, presentation of self.
Online we can hide what we really look like, an old profile picture for some is a way of hiding our true image, so that we will not be open to judgement. But should there be any judgement?
Looking at my presentation on Web 2.0, my Facebook account is purely personal, while I like my profile pictures to be nice I don't consider how it may look to anyone in my field seeing it. Through my personal page I am linked to dance teacher groups and have even recently acquired teaching work through the pages but it has never occurred to me that my profile picture may skew someones impression of me. Many of my Facebook friends, would probably be surprised to hear that I'm still dancing or teaching. Visually my professional practice is very much something I just turn on when I am in a dance class and not at all represented by my media self. However 10 years ago, I was very much a dancer online, while there weren't the networks and online considerations that there are now, I wanted anyone viewing my profile to see that I was in fact a dancer.
2009 Facebook Profile
VS
2018 Facebook Profile
When creating my blog, I'll admit that used a photo that is 8 years old, I didn't feel that a 'selfie' or family photo (the kind of image I'm usually in) was professional enough. Is it OK that my photo is out of date? Is this false representation?
After having my first child I went to teach dance for a friend I danced with at college. I hadn't seen her for years and when she posted on Facebook she was looking for a teacher, I got straight in touch, and the job was mine. In our initial messages I did say " I have put on a lot of weight", it was only 3 months since having my son, so my friend laughed it off and said no more. I started the job a few weeks later and while there was no mention of my size, I felt that it was an issue. I was predominantly teaching the senior performance team, and while I created some original and well received dances, I felt there was never a great connection. Did they not take me seriously as a teacher? Did they not see me as a dancer? This may sound irrational, but I witnessed them come alive and act totally differently when they were taught by a 19 year old teacher straight from dance college. While it could have been down to my teaching style or personality, a part of me wonders if I would have had a better response if I was half the size having just come off tour with Little Mix?? Needless to say after going on maternity leave with my second child, I haven't discussed going back.
At the start of the course I was nervous of the Skype discussions as I didn't want anyone to see me (especially that awful laptop angle) I made sure I put make up on and even wore something dancey!! I was so relieved when there was no video. The stereotypes put on dancers has caused me now, when I am my most experienced and creative to be the least confident I have ever been.
Presentation of self has many angles of consideration. I started writing my blog, thinking i would have a balance of personal honesty and professionalism. Well I feel that's all gone out of the window, and while this is not something that will go into my critical reflection essay in great detail, the ethics surrounding size maybe something I continue to explore.
This whole blog was really inspired by the question below????
On Sunday nights X Factor there was a performance of 'This Is Me' performed by Keala Settle, it was a great arrangement but the first thing I noticed was that one of the dancers was - Whats the term?? ' Plus Sized' I hate that I even have to use a term, as she was fantastic. But was she merely part of the ensemble because of the message in the song? Would she become a regular on X Factor now?
What are the stereotypes that effect you and your practice? Are you your true-self online?
Hi Charlie, I really like this post because I feel like this is really relevant within dance, even job applications need your height, measurements etc. and when a dancer can be cut from a line up just based on their physique or appearance, I think there is pressure to represent yourself in a certain way. I personally would say I have not used Web 2.0 such as Facebook or Instagram to show my practice up until recently this year. Even when I do post dance related posts I certainly am conscious if I look enough like a dancer... For the X Factor question, I feel like it's possible they could have chosen her to fit the song, but I do like to believe as she was a brilliant dancer her talent carried her through majority. But I will be looking out if I can see her again regularly on there. Sian
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